Monthly Archives: November 2008

I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

Question:
I’m worried because my new partner says he wants to have oral sex on me, but I’m concerned and embarrassed about my piles. Do you think he’ll be disgusted? What can I do about them?

 

Answer:
When men decide to go down, they are interested in lashing their tongues on their partners’ clitorises and the upper part of the vulva. It is unlikely they lash their tongues on the lower vulva which is closer to the anus if they are freakish to the anus. Even if they do so it is unlikely they notice the odd looking anus or the piles if the piles are protruded. If the piles are not that prominent it will not be noticeable. If you are not comfortable to give in do inform him that you may want sometime to think about giving him the permission to go down on you. I am sure he will respect your wishes. During that time you can get treatment for your piles.

 

My vagina feels pain and sore whenever my partner uses a condom. Without it, everything is fine. How do I remedy this problem?

Question:
I’m 23 and have just started being sexually active. My problem is my vagina feels pain and sore whenever my partner uses a condom. Without it, everything is fine. Both of us feel that using condoms is the best and safest way of contraception and we would like to stick to it. How do I remedy this problem?

 

Answer:
Some man and woman experience adverse effects with condoms. They are allergic to the additives that are present in the condom besides the proteins and the lubricants. With new generation condoms that are hypo allergenic this is no longer an issue and if some mild effects are present like mild pain and soreness, the reasons might be the dryness of the vagina and maybe the prolonged friction brought by the less sensitive penis(less sensitive because of the condom).In these cases a good water based lubricant would help. If this too does not help then you need to consider other method, like the pill for example or non penetrative sex for contraception

 

Can I get any diseases from it even if my partner does not have any STDs?

Question:
I’ve just started experimenting on oral sex. I’m just curious if there would be any harm of swallowing instead of spitting. Can I get any diseases from it even if my partner does not have any STDs?

Answer:
So you are adventurous, good for you and your lucky partner. Be extra careful not to bite him. Your bite might be more harmful compared to swallowing his semen. You might enjoy a gourmet dish with the dash of salt and nothing else if his semen is microbes free.

I guess I have a special preference in choosing partner. It is normal?

Question:
I guess I have a special preference in choosing partner. It is normal? I’m a 23 young Chinese girl. I failed in my relationship with those same age group. I wish can find a partner that is understand me and older than me. and I prefer he is a doctor. Because myself is in medical line. I more prefer my partner is in medical line.

Answer:
It is good to know ones preference with regard to finding a soul mate. There is nothing abnormal about that. At least you know what you want in life. You failed in your relationship with men of your age and now you like to try older men. You can try to get in contact with a dating service so that they can get you in contact with the person of your choice, an elderly and compassionate doctor. However you must know relationship is something that need to nuture and both parties need to make serious effort to make it work, otherwise it is going to be a failure. I wish you best luck in your quest.

Any ways too speed up his libido and to make me feel the climax?

Question: Hi there! I’ve been married to a wonderful guy in August 2008. I was a virgin until I got married. I do know lots of techniques, positions and tips although I’m not involved practically, thanks to the info on the net these days! First month of our marriage was good, I took almost 10 days to get penetrated, it was very hurtful. After that, all had been smooth sailing till he left to his country. We were together for at least 20 days from the day we got married, minus the 10 days of inable to penetrate, 7 days of my period, so we had good sex for about 3 days till he went back. I was back alone in my country for 1month without him (visa waiting).Now I’m with him and it’s been a month now. First 2 weeks our sex was really good, and then I noticed he started to slow down or get excited quickly. We\’re not planning to have kid at the moment, and he loves the pull out method. Using condom is very disturbing for both of us and we decided to just go on without it but every time he gets climaxed, he pulled it out, that where I will be frustrated because I was almost cum. He even inserts 3 fingers n it was so smooth and I’ll ask him to go faster, but I can’t feel it coming. Am I being loose down there or? Even during sexual intercourse, its very hard for me too feels it nowadays. So I’ll ask him to do faster because it excites me but he will get tired easily. These days we had been just cuddling and kissing on the bed n he’ll go to sleep after that. Is this a normal situation for newly married? On the other hand, I will get upset so fast and emotional because didn’t get to do it. What is happening to us doctor? Any ways too speed up his libido and to make me feel the climax? I’ve spoken to him and he told me he’s too tired because of the office work. He wanted it but he tries to cut down quickly everytime he caresses my private parts.
Answer: So the honeymoon is over and back to day to day activities. When things get out of tune then you got to get it fixed, together as a team and not through tantrums. You mentioned that you were a virgin before marriage. It’s like getting a car and you have never driven it before, then you learn to drive against all the odds and get through. Now you are getting the hang of it and you like to drive as often as you can even with the slightest excuse. You are driving your mate like you are driving that car! Lovemaking is not just getting off. You might get off but he has to work hard and stressed up. When one is stressed one has no control on oneself. That’s what happens to your mate. He was doing fine before you are broken in. Now its look like you has broken him! The signs of stress are tiredness, unable to focus or to concentrate and more so in love making, erection is short lasting and ejaculation is too fast. Maybe you need to slow down, do more non penetrative sex than penetrative sex. Enjoy body mutual contact and massages. Enjoy caressing with mouth and tongue. You can encourage him to tongue your clitoris. The gentle and moist touch of the tongue will drive you to nerve shattering climax. You can let him finger your G-spot, the area at the roof of your vagina,3cm from your vaginal entrance, with deep stroke and if you started to feel the urge to pass urine, that might be the sign of impending climax and maybe female ejaculation, just do it. You will not pee, the flow from your vagina is your ejaculations. You will notice that he will be strong and hardy in the morning and his flagpole will remain steady fast. This will be your opportunity to ride him on and you will be able to experience a headsplitting climax. Look into the positive side of lovemaking. You have got a long way to go. Always bring back the car to fill the tank full and not to get it overheated!

Why did happen and how can I convince my husband that I’m not lying to him about my virginity?

Question:
I was a virgin until my wedding day. The problem is on my first night with my husband, I did not bleed at all. Now my husband is having doubts about my virginity. Why did this happen and how can I convince my husband that I’m not lying to him?

Answer:
It is sad to know that at this modern time we still have men who are ignorant about the meaning of virginity. Virginity is a status and not a thing. That piece of thin flesh that covers the vaginal entrance, the so-called hymen may be present and may not be present naturally and even if it is present it can remain so even after sexual penetration if it is elastic and therefore is not a sign of virginity. A tear in the vaginal entrance or a tear of the hymen may be caused by a penetrating injury and not necessarily caused buy an erect penis if the woman claims so. Therefore the question of virginity does not arise if the woman insists she has not had penetrative sex with a man. The issue here is plain trust! Furthermore there is no reason for the woman to bleed if she relaxes her well lubricated vaginal entrance to accommodate the erect penis and more so if the penis is miniscule. Grow up man!